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Gissa job May 13, 2006

Posted by BiB in Uncategorized.
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14 comments

I can’t bear translating for another single second (but have to). But once this bearing session’s over and done with, I want something else. So this is a direct appeal. Gissa job.

Criteria: in Berlin. Not prepared to move again yet (or ever, perhaps). Salary: don’t mind, really, though preferably tonnes. Nature of work: preferably a piece of cake, involving nothing that would take me anywhere near an industrial estate/retail park/building site/place where overweight heterosexual men talk about technicalia.

I have all the necessary qualifications and traits of character required to satisfactorily fill any position: I am lazy, unambitious, impractical, unreliable and utterly incapable of working in a team. But I can be a naked table, or something like that. Or make tea. (But I can’t cook.) Supremely obsequious and subservient. Criminally poor knowledge of German.

So how can you resist? Isn’t that just the profile of a winner (with a capital L)? Anything considered. But write fast to avoid disappointment…